Squodge – A method of mixing which involves gingerly moving food around a pan and cursing as bits of it slip over the edge, welding themselves to the hob with a sound like a snake being slowly run through a mangle.
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When I do finally sit down in front of my laptop, that’s it. For hour after bleary eyed hour I will type until my fingers look like chunks of Pepperami smeared with lovely raspberry jam.
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The country lies in ashen tatters.
Who will lead us? Doesn’t matter!
The lot of ’em are mad as hatters,
but Boris looks a shoe in.
I just sent this to L’oreal, regarding their Garnier brand. You know, formerly Laboratoires Garnier? Yeah, took a bit of set up but I feel it’s worth it…
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Horse-Flies. Irritation? Or winged demons hellbent on the elimination of all life on the planet? I’d always assumed the former, but it would seem that i’ve underestimated these flying fiends. Until recently, i’ve relied solely on information gleaned during my 33 years on the planet, my own experience of having […]
Continue ReadingDear reader, allow me to spin you a tale of mystery, suspense and intrigue. A tale which may chill the bones and quicken the heart. A true story, of course*. Are you sitting comfortably? Then I shall begin… This evening, I found myself sitting idle, restless, so decided to cross […]
