The things you see…
You know when you’re sharing a bath with a group of strangers and you just don’t know who’s duck has gone where?
NO! OF COURSE YOU DON’T! NO-ONE BLOODY DOES!
So very tired…
If I seem a little short today, it’s because i’m standing in a ditch.
HA HA HA HA HA!
Sorry, so sorry.
I would never normally make such a terrible joke but the sleep deprivation has quite addled me.
Why so tired, I hear you ask?
I will tell you…
I Failed The British Citizenship Test
I failed the test, scoring 13 out of 24.
I now have insufficient knowledge of my country of birth to remain and must be shipped immediately to deepest, darkest Peru, to shack up with Paddington’s aunt.
Continue ReadingRead With Al – Rapunzel
Are you sitting comfortably? Yes? I don’t care, get the hell out of my chair. Now, I shall begin… Once upon a time, back when people were particularly stupid, there lived a young couple. The woman (they never bothered to name her because she doesn’t feature in story for long) […]
Continue Reading21st Century Dodo’s
Why do I smell chlorofo-*thud* — This is not Al Vimh. Sorry to disappoint. He’s allowed me to pop in today in a sordid attempt to persuade some of you to buy my new book, 21st Century Dodos. It is a collection of eulogies to extinct and endangered inanimate objects, […]
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