The World According To Al Vimh

Snow Day

Over the past few days I found myself become increasingly irritated by the mass of posts to Facebook and Twitter, all saying essentially the same thing.
“OMG IS IT SNOWING WHERE YOU ARE, WHEN’S THE SNOW COMING? SNOOOOOOOOWWWWW!!!! OMG LOL ROFL”
Sweet, weeping Jesus people!
Ok, so meteorology is just guesswork with a fancy name, but nevertheless, they forecast snow, all you had to do was wait to see if it did in fact happen.

Of course, the moment snow was forecast, the panic began.
January 5th, the day before half of Britain disappeared under a blanket of white, we nipped to Tesco for a few odds and ends.
Huge mistake…
Never before have I seen an elderly woman bulk buying kitty litter with such an expression of mortal dread.
I can only assume cat’s defecate more when it’s cold?
Granted, considering the weather warnings, picking up essentials before the snow hit was in fact a sensible plan.
This does not mean that I expect to be horribly trampled in the rush for the last few boxes of Sugar Puffs.

Having returned from the riot, beaten and bruised, we settled in to await the coming of the dreaded snow.
In a truly astonishing turn of events, the Met Office was proven right for once and we awoke on January 6th to find ourselves snowed in, trapped with no hope of escape.
I could not have been happier at that moment.
An unquestionable excuse to avoid the outside world? Heaven.

My joy was shortlived however, when I logged on to Facebook.
“OMG IT SNOWED OMG LOOK AT THE SNOW WOW IT’S SNOW LOL OMG”
Yes. It snowed. Thank you for the update.

Having said all of that, who doesn’t love the snow?
Staring out over a crisp blanket of white, snowball fights, zooming down the hills on a bright red sledge and, best of all, building a snowman.
I love to see children at play, rolling huge balls of snow down hills to build the biggest snowman possible, slapping a hat on his head and popping on a carrot for the nose, seeing the horrified expressions on their little faces as I arrive with my flamethrower…

Have fun in the snow folks

Al out.

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3 Comments

  1. I KNO RITE??? you’d think snow was a freak occurence like the aurora borealis we had one year in illinois (which really is an oddity here, never seen one before or since in the great state of IL). cant say ill be playin in it tho. i’ll wait until i have kids to relive the joys of freezin me arse off.

    • I will admit the snow is particularly heavy here right now but even so, it takes but a single flake to land in this part of the world and we are talking all out, rioting in the streets, killing your fellow man and feasting on his organs insanity.

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